Stop Blaming Yourself
by AnimeGirl 144
Summary: America takes England getting blind to heart. In his injured state, what is he drastic enough to do? And what will England do to help his upset brother?


**So after reading some HetaOni stories, I wanted to give it a try. I hope you all enjoy it.**

* * *

The walk back to the safe house was a quiet trip. America had nothing to say, and the occupant on his back had passed out some time ago, so there was no one to talk to. America didn't mind in the least; he wasn't sure what to say to the unconscious nation on his back. As it was, America probably wasn't in the right state of mind to hold long conversations. The young nation was fighting back tears has his mind remembered everything that had happened in the time that had passed. He wanted to catalog every moment, so that he could see where he'd made his mistake. He wanted to remember all the wrong he had done to the nation. When he came upon the steps to their safe house, he trudged slowly, making sure he didn't hurt England or jolt him as he walked up the steps. He didn't want to deal with the others, but England needed a place to rest. When he opened the door, he was greeted by a relieved Canada.

"Where were you two?!" Canada demanded, raising his voice only slightly. "What happened to England?"

"He fell unconscious," America answered seriously, walking to a nearby bed and placing the older nation in it. "The battle with the creature took a toll on him."

Canada was so focused on England as he came to squat on the man's unoccupied side. He looked up, expecting to still see America on the other side, looking at England. He was surprised to find the spot empty. The door to the safe room closing drew everyone to the staircases.

"Where is he going?" Canada asked in worry.

"Don't know. America seemed upset, da?" Russia asked.

Canada stared at the door in worry but turned back to England. America could take care of himself, especially if the others were out there to help him.

* * *

America didn't care where he stumbled to; anywhere away from England was better. If he stayed far enough away from the other nation, perhaps England would get better. He was a failure; he couldn't help anyone. He couldn't even save anyone.

He walked down a random hallway before he fell to his knees. The weight of continued failure after failure racked up on him, making it hard for him to continue on. Images of his friends, even the Axis, flashed through his mind.

"Let them go!" America shouted to the mansion. "Let them leave here! I'll take their place! If you want a sacrifice, someone to stay behind, then choose me! I'll stay behind!" His voice lowered as tears began to escape from his closed eyes. "Just let them all go. Please."

A roar sounded down the hall, close to America's position. Sadness quickly turned to anger. Standing up, he watched the creature approach him at a fast speed. America didn't bother to run away from the creature as it neared; he was done being a failure. He'd kill it. Even though he still hadn't healed from his previous brawls, America was determined to fight and kill it. As the creature reached America, the nation launched himself at the monster and tackled it to the ground. He began to punch the creature, releasing his fury upon the creature that dared to cross his path. Not to be outdone, the creature swatted the nation off of him, sending him to the wall. America wasn't down for long; he immediately got up with a growl and ran at the creature, punching it in the gut.

"America!" Japan called as he turned the corner.

He came to a stop a few feet away from the brawl; Prussia came to a stop next to him. Both of them were surprised to see the American nation beating the creature with his bare hands. Tears were racing down America's cheeks as he punched at the creature, staining his fists with its blood. The creature had its mouth around America's arm, clenching its teeth on his arm, hoping to hit the bone and distract the nation. It did nothing to deter the determined nation as he continued to pound away at the monster's head.

"Whoa. Who knew he could do that?" Prussia asked, staring in shock.

"I... I do not know," Japan responded.

"JUST DIE!" America screamed as his fist managed to make it through the skin.

The creature released a scream of pain before it laid limp against the ground. America didn't notice anything and continued to punch it. Japan prepared to step in, but stopped when he saw the way America's punches became unbalanced and with less power. He soon came to a full stop and just sat on the dead creature, crying pitifully. Japan stared at the nation in sympathy, having never seen America act out. Something was wrong with the boy, but Japan didn't know what it was, or how to bring it up. The question running through his mind was what had caused America to freak out like he had.

Prussia stepped up.

"C'mon kid. It's time to head back to the safe room," Prussia said, raising his voice for the other nation to hear.

America didn't react at first, causing Prussia to walk up to the kid. He placed a hand on America's shoulder, which was actually a mistake. The American quickly grabbed Prussia's wrist and twisted it, causing the silver-haired man to fall to his knees and release a cry of pain.

"America!" Japan cried, pulling America out of his trance.

America blinked and looked at Prussia. Seeing that it was a friend and not an enemy, America released his hold quickly, muttering an apology as he looked away.

"Damn it. Who knew you were _that _strong to take down the awesome me?" Prussia questioned as he rubbed his wrist.

If it was meant to be a joke, America didn't laugh. Prussia stopped his ministrations and frowned, looking over at Japan for advice. Japan stepped forward.

"America, we shourd return to the safe room," Japan said. "There may be more creatures out here."

America didn't respond.

"America," Japan tried again, keeping his voice calm. "Your arm is breeding. Prease, ret us bandage it." Japan stepped forward at this point and tempted his fate by touching America on his uninjured arm.

Nothing happened for a long time until America turned to look at Japan from over his shoulder. Japan could see that the tears were still falling, causing America's eyes to be read and his cheeks to be pink.

"...Okay," America answered, his voice barely above a whisper.

Japan and Prussia helped America can and helped him walk back to the safe room. At some point in the fight, he must have injured his leg since the boy was limping as they walked back to the safe room. America remained unusually quiet, something that unnerved the two Axis alligned nations. When they arrived back at the safe room, they were surprised by the outburst once they arrived.

"Unhand me this moment! That idiot is out there doing Lord knows what!" England shouted as he was held back from his middle by France.

"Angleterre, calm down," France demanded as he struggled to keep a hold of the fighting Englishman.

"Whoa. It seems some people are having freak outs today," Prussia commented.

"Engrand, prease. Carm down," Japan requested stepping forward, though he was ignored.

"England," Canada said, trying to get through to England, but his voice was drowned out by England's tantrum.

No one had noticed the American standing by the doorway. No one had even noticed the three nations entrance.

"If you do not unhand me this moment I will kill you froggy!" England threatened, struggling more to break free of France's grips. "America is badly injured and he shouldn't be out there alone! He's in no condition to fight if something goes wrong."

Prussia released a chuckle, not noticing the sad look set on America's face.

"Neither are you," France responded back.

"Let me go!" England responded as dark energy began to build up around him.

"Wow. It's like we're invisible," Prussia commented to Japan.

Japan looked to America, to see what he'd do, but the other nation was silent, looking at the scene sadly. Japan looked back at England, wondering what France meant by his statement. Canada looked frantically at his former caretaker before noticing America by the doorway.

"America!" Canada said with relief.

England stilled upon hearing the name of his former colony. America lowered his head slightly and looked away. Japan watched England carefully, seeing how the man wouldn't turn in the direction of the nation he had been arguing to go after.

"Where? Can you point me in the right direction," England asked, keeping his voice steady and neutral.

Canada took England's arm gently and turned him in America's direction. Japan watched it in surprise. His eyes widened when he saw England's blank eyes looking at nothing in general. From his peripheral vision, he noticed America look away. This only furthered Japan's questions. Canada came to a stop a few feet from America, stopping England right in front of the young nation. Sensing that he was in front of the American, England reached out and grabbed for America. Unfortunately, he gripped America's shoulder, the one that was still injured from both creatures. America hissed in pain, biting his lip. England's face changed in surprise and he quickly removed his hand from the bleeding shoulder.

"What happened to your shoulder?" England demanded, sounding worried.

"Nothing. It's fine," America said, squinting his eyes as he hissed in pain.

"Nothing?" Prussia questioned, looking at America like he was a nut. "That creature had his teeth imbedded in your arm! I can see bone!"

America sent a glare at the Germanic blooded nation. England's eyes and mouth widened together.

"What?! You did what?!" England demanded.

"It was nothing," America responded.

"_Nothing!? _America, your bone can be seen! This is bad!" England said, beginning to fret over his injured ally.

"I'm fine England, really. It'll heal," America responded, clutching his arm self-consciously.

"What the bloody hell were you thinking!?" England demanded.

"Nothing," America responded.

"Of course it was nothing! You weren't thinking anything! You never do!" England shouted, growing angrier by the second. "You act without thinking and it causes problems and messes!"

Everyone expected America to fight back. They expected something, but ended up with nothing. America refused to meet England's gaze, keeping his eyes fixated on something at England's feet. England wasn't really looking at America. To Japan, it looked like the other island nation was looking through the American.

"Excuse me," Japan said, breaking through the tension.

"Yes Japan?" England asked, though he didn't look in the other man's direction.

"Engrand... are you brind?" Japan asked as carefully as he could.

Japan watched as England tensed slightly; watched as America's whole body gave a jolt, like he was electrocuted. His eyes shone with guilt, continuing to look at anything but England. Canada winced in sympathy, and that was all the clues Japan needed to confirm his belief.

"Engrand, are you brind?" Japan asked again, trying to get the other nation to admit it.

"Holy crap! You're blind!?" Prussia demanded, suddenly interested.

"Oh don't sound so concern Gilbert!" England snapped in Prussia's general direction, having guessed the direction the sound had come from.

"Well how did it happen Mr. Gentleman?" Prussia questioned mockingly.

Once again, England remained silent, tensing up. America's hands had balled into fists before he released them. Japan watched the young nation carefully, waiting to see if he'd cause a fight.

"It's because of me," America answered, his voice serious and low.

Everyone looked at America in shock, but stayed silent, waiting for the boy to continue. America wouldn't raise his eyes to meet theirs, but he knew what they were asking.

"England had used up all his magic to kill the creature that had been down in the annex. It had caused his magic to lash out at him, making him blind," America responded.

"But... how is it your fault?" France asked.

"Because I should have stopped him earlier!" America answered, practically screaming the response.

It caused many of the gathered nations to jump back in fear; only England stood his ground, facing away from the American. Tears began to spring from America's eyes as he remembered every detail of the event.

"If I had just thought for a moment to tell England what would happen, maybe none of this would have happened," America answered.

"America, you shourd not brame yourserf," Japan said calmly.

America shook his head.

"It's my fault Japan. I failed as a hero, just like everything else I've done," America answered, his eyes losing that spark that everyone came to know.

England reached out again, managing to find America's uninjured shoulder. America tensed, glancing up lightly. England was looking in his direction.

"Stop blaming yourself America," England said. "It's alright. Now then, let's tend to your wounds."

America stared at England in surprise.

"England, you can't see at all," Canada reminded, finding his voice again. "I'll bandage him up."

"...Very well," England said.

Japan might have been hearing things, but he could have sworn he heard anger lacing England's voice. Canada lead England to the beds since he wouldn't give up on his hold on America, so America was being lead along behind him. Canada sat America on one of the beds while England sat across from him on the other bed. Japan observed the two nations while Canada ran off to grab medical equipment.

America was looking at anyone but his former caretaker, still not able to take blank eyes staring at him. Looking over his shoulder, he noticed Italy lying in one of the beds with Germany keeping a vigil watch over him. America stared in surprise, since he had left with England after the older nation had fainted.

"What happened to Italy?" America asked with concern.

"He was attacked by the creature in the annex," Japan responded, his eyes saddening slightly.

America's eyes widened.

"I-I remember. That noise," America muttered. "That's right. Italy... he had gone off to look for my glasses in the other room... I was going to go after him..." America's shoulders slumped in guilt. He had forgotten about Italy after what happened to England. "It's my fault. If I hadn't lost my glasses... then Italy wouldn't have had to go and find them. And he wouldn't of been attacked. Everything is my fault."

Germany released a cry of anger. He stood from his seat and stomped towards America, his face red in anger. America didn't bother to move and watched the German approach him. England, however, seemed aware of his surroundings and stood up, glaring at Germany. It seemed it was enough to pause the angry nation's actions. America only stared at England in surprise.

"Leave him alone Germany," England ordered.

"He needs to know better! How long has he been in this mansion and yet he doesn't know that he has to be more careful!" Germany shouted in anger. "He's the most careless nation here and he's going to get more of us killed!"

England's glare intensified. Everyone wisely stayed away, not wanting to be part of the tension. Germany stood tall, though there were sweat-drops that fell from his forehead.

"He's still a child, and he doesn't need you yelling at him. He's realized his mistakes, and screaming at him isn't going to help anyone," England said calmly, though he was anything but.

Germany stared at the island nation for a while before looking away. He turned and went back to Italy's side, sitting next to the bed. England must have heard the noise because he sat back down, tapping on America's knee; he'd just barely missed the knee. America continued to stare in shock at the other nation, not expecting him (of all people) to come to his rescue. Canada stepped forward and began to fix up America's wound, his hands shaking slightly from the tension.

"Th-thank you," America said. "You didn't-"

"Stop acting like a wounded pet," England snapped. "It doesn't suit you. Despite how annoying it is that you like to spew how you're the hero, it actually keeps us sane."

America stared at his older brother in surprise before nodding.

"O-okay," he responded. "I'll... I'll help you get around and stuff. Because... I'm the hero."

England gave a nod as a tiny smile appeared on his face.

"Right," he said.

America returned a small smile of his own, but he wasn't so sure everything would go back to normal. For that moment though, he felt better; he felt like everything would be fine.


End file.
